Pride

"Bila nak kahwin?"

A frequent question asked by a different type of people. Surprisingly, this question was not coming from my mom or my family members but from my friends. At this stage, why must I think about marriage when I don't even have CPF yet? Worst my savings. Because I'm having someone in my life doesn't mean I want to think about marriage. It's not that I don't like people asking me this question but whenever I'm in group, that's the question they will ask. Worst than my mom. All I can say to them repeatedly was, "Not so soon. Still long way to go." Not that I don't want to think about marriage but if I want to plan, I don't like to plan it in front of them. Marriage, only me and him and Allah knows when. Stop asking me "jng lupe jemput klw nk kahwin." -.-"

Kahwin. It is a most common word which many of us use to describe it as, marriage. Another meaning of it is, making love once you have already marriage. Again,being teased by this word and I know, they meant it as a joke but I'm a girl and talking openly about this makes me angry. This joke is not funny. I find it ridiculous if they joke around and I am the victim here. I have my pride and dignity and they talk as if I don't have any. A friend asked me this, "Kau da hilang virginity?" and soon he laughed at me without feeling any guilty at all. I am sad. I am mad. I am truly upset with the statement. I was alone and no one defend me and all I can do now is to keep quiet. Again, they don't have any insensitivity towards a girl. Sigh.

I know myself well. It's up to them to judge. Their joke are not funny. They're talking about themselves and I'm the victim of all this. Victim of their pathetic jokes again and again. It is always me. A smile from me to them followed by shaking of my head and a shrug to make them realized I am not happy at all. I will tolerate if I can really tolerate this. One more joke like this, I'm gonna burst.

Before you talk or joke around about this, reflect yourself in the mirror. I'm not you. You are not me. Enough said.

"Salam Maulidur Rasul"